EASTER ISLAND

LISA – I had this strange dream last night, Marianne. Instead of having our usual Thursday night council meeting in Victoria, we were having it on Easter Island.

MARIANNE – That is weird, even by your standards, Lisa.

LISA – But it was beautiful, Marianne. Easter Island was a creative hub of young professionals.

MARIANNE – Young professionals?

LISA – The artists who carved the statues. And greenhouse gas emissions were almost nonexistent because everyone used active forms of transportation.

MARIANNE – You mean they walked?

LISA – That might be another way of putting it.

MARIANNE – Sounds like paradise.

LISA – Except for the housing shortage.

MARIANNE – There was a housing shortage on Easter Island?

LISA – Because of all the Airbnbs.

MARIANNE – If you say so.

LISA – But that’s when Absurd Properties stepped forward and said they’d help fix the problem by building a luxury condominium. The only thing is they’d require a variance to cut down a few trees.

MARIANNE – And council approved the application?

LISA – How could we not? The future depends on increased density. You’ve said so many times yourself, Marianne.

MARIANNE – So what happened next, Lisa?

LISA – Council kept approving condo project after condo project until all of the trees on the island were chopped down and everybody died.

MARIANNE – Sounds more like a nightmare than a dream, Lisa.

LISA – But what do you think it means, Marianne?

MARIANNE – Either you’ve been smoking too much wacky tabacky, Lisa, or else you’ve had one of those visions Chief Sam I Am is always going on about.

LISA – Do you think I’ve seen into the future?

MARIANNE – Maybe so.

LISA – But is Vancouver Island doomed to suffer the same fate as Easter Island?

MARIANNE – It might not be as far-fetched as you’d think. Can you imagine if the only thing left of Victoria centuries from now are the bike lanes? I wonder what archaeologists would make of that?

LISA – That Victoria once had a very progressive mayor?

MARIANNE – Who perhaps wasn’t quite as smart as she thought she was.